Cohen update 11;15

It's 11:15! Praise God! There is no other explanation. He is still breathing on his own. Nice and pink, great oxygen levels. The NICU doctors have said he definitely has some sort of dysplasia, and they are sending a geneticist to come tomorrow. That's right TOMORROW! The doctors believe that he will at least live for a couple of days. We are believing our God is big enough to let him live a whole lot longer than that! Here is a picture of Cohen and Emily. -Kelley Haff

Doing alright...

Cohen is sucking a paci! He's still in the NICU but seems to be doing pretty well. We saw some pictures and he's beautiful! Looks like Cort with chubbier cheeks. His color was great...and his APGAR scores were 8 & 9 out of 10....very good! He is receiving chest x-rays and Emily is still in recovery. AND...he's 5.67 lbs. That's what we know right now. Keep praying that he can continue to breathe. Chris did say about half an hour ago that he seemed to be having a bit of trouble breathing, but there are a lot of really hopeful things right now. KEEP PRAYING!

OK...new news just in. He is pink and screaming. His limbs apparently look short, but not what you'd have thought. God is good!

Cohen Christopher McGowan is born!

Cohen was born at 9:23. Emily got to hold him. He was breathing on his own. He has been taken back to do chest x-rays and Chris stayed with Emily. That's what we know. They got to hold him! Praise God!

Updated for stats: 5lbs 6.7 oz. 16 1/4 inches

she's gone in...

Latest update from the hospital is that Emily was just wheeled back for surgery. Pray for healing...God is greater than we can even imagine. Will keep you all posted as we find out more.

going in soon...

It's 8:10 right now and Emily has been prepped for her c-section and will be going in shortly. We will post again as soon as we know anything. Please pray for Doctors Dubose and Keller who will be attending to Emily. They are both amazing women and incredible doctors. Pray for the nurses and other people who will be around Emily during her surgery. Pray for their time as a family. Pray that Cohen is healed....God doesn't need time for miracles, he just wants our faith.

SOON

Hi all-just got an update that they are starting Emily on an IV now and the C-Section will be at least an hour away.  It is 6:25 right now.  PRAY

On the way to the hospital

FYI-this is Miranda Carson posting on behalf of the McGowans...any updates I receive from here on out I will post to this site so that you all will know what is going on with them until they are ready to start posting again.

***

Please pray for the McGowans-they are on the way to the hospital as a write this, possibly for a C-Section tonight.  Just yesterday Emily's blood pressure registered high at her regular check up, and her swelling has been getting worse.  She borrowed a monitor from friends and checked herself today, and it went up even higher, something like 142/90 I believe.  So the doctor saw her again today at 1:00.  Apparently something in her bloodwork came back "not good"  (Sorry, I don't have any specifics and have barely spoken with Emily), they called her 4-ish this afternoon and they ordered her to go straight to the hospital.  

Just this morning I was reminded of a verse from Jeremiah 32:17:  AH LORD GOD!  BEHOLD, YOU HAVE MADE THE HEAVENS AND THE EARTH BY YOUR GREAT POWER AND BY YOUR OUTSTRETCHED ARM!  NOTHING IS TOO DIFFICULT FOR YOU.  

Please join me in praying for the McGowans and for Cohen's little body--that God would choose to heal him and give him long life--it is NOT too difficult for God.  Please pray for Chris and Emily right now that they will have clear minds and peaceful hearts to make quick decisions and to wait on God and His perfect plan for Cohen's life.  

36 week appointment

We had our 36 week appointment today. I as 36 weeks on Monday. When we went to the doctor last week my fluid levels were borderline and they had been decreasing every week. This was definitally making me a little nervous. Today they had held at the same level so we were grateful that they hadn't dropped anymore. The ultrasound was good today. It was just the 2D one but he was cooperative and we got to see him move a little and even suck on his hand some. The Ultrasound technician was so nice - she put the ultrasound on DVD without us even asking her to. I made her cry because it was just harder to see him today. I guess as we get closer the reality of what might happen just comes to the surface more. He was so cute trying to suck on his hand. It's hard to think I might not get to see him do that here. She told us she was praying for us and that she admired us for what we were doing. It's a really nice thing to say but it makes me sad that it's really all that admirable - meaning it makes me sad that this wouldn't be the norm - that so many others choose to do this differently. The time we have with Cohen so far is something we would never trade for anything. I know so many doctors pressure women into terminating early and my heart breaks for them. I am so thankful of how supportive our doctors have been.
I don't think I updated about our specialist appointment last week. They didn't get a great look at his broken arm but either believe it to have healed or that it was possibly never totally fractured - maybe just a really severe bowing. We were glad of that news.
My c-section date is three weeks from this coming Friday. It will be March 21 at 1:00pm if I make it until then. Three weeks seems like so long to get to meet him but so short of a time to have left with him for sure. Please pray that I make it to the c-section date. Pray for us as we try to tie up lose ends and make arrangements for that time.

A Little about Cort

So, I feel a little guilty about my lack of posts about Cort. Life is so busy right now and adding that with a very busy little boy means not a lot of picture taking these days. For the most part I get the back of his head as he is running away. Here are a few recent tidbits about Cort that I didn't want to forget:

* He is very into his colors and knows most of them now. He still mixes yellow and orange - well he always gets orange right but often calls yellow orange. And me mixes red and pink sometimes. He's a pro at blue, green, brown, white, and black.

* He sings a lot these days. To go along with the color fixation he loves the rainbow song and can sing most of it when he chooses. He's getting pretty good at his abc's - but does best with the ending and the middle. Don't know why the beginning seems to pass him by. He's also pretty into the Itsy Bitsy Spider. Car rides are so cute these days as I am often serenaded with songs.

* I love the way he is starting to carrying on conversations. We can ask him things like, "what did you do at school today?" and he is actually starting to tell us. Too fun.

* Playdoh may be the top new toy. He loves it. Sometimes he wants to make things and other times he wants to sort the colors and stack the containers. He really likes to make sure he puts the right color in the right container based on the tiny traces of doh left in them.

* Funny comment - A few weeks ago we went by Chris' work and Cort and I told Cort it was time to go home and play. He looked at Chris and said, " Daddy Play?" Chris said, "No, Mommy will play, Daddy has to work." Cort promptly looked at me and said, " No, Daddy play, Mommy work." I guess it could have hurt my feelings but instead it just seemed so cute!!!

* We have had 2 knock out tantrums in public over the past month. The first one was in Target and I still don't know what it was about. Three people actually looked at me and just said, "WOW!" as I was walking out of the store with my screaming child. The second was just yesterday at Chic-fil-a. We met our friends Kelley, Sophie and Foster there for lunch. Cort went up into the slides and tunnels for the first time and had an absolute blast. He did not have a blast when it was time to go. He was hysterical. I got caught on the bench by kids putting there shoes on and just had to sit there with my screaming, flailing child. I had warned him it was the last time he going down so as he screamed he kept saying, "Last time, last time." He pulled it together as I was finally free to go and then knocked over my sprite which fell on the ground and on a poor little boy. It didn't really get him all that wet but still - i was completely mortified. I was totally that parent - the one everyone was thinking wicked, horrible things about since I apparently couldn't control my 2 year old child!!! Though, find me a parent that always can and I'll sign up for parenting classes with them. Kelley was a good sport seeing that by association, she was probably getting the evil eye too!. Over eight month's pregnant with a flailing 2 year old - what a picture. Cort is usually so laid back but when he decides he doesn't like something and wants you to know there is no holding back. Self-control is def. our weak point.

Some long over due pics:

At the Park:






With Walker:



Bounce House Inside Logan's House - great fun!!:



Before the big Chic-fil-a Melt down( Doesn't he look tiny inside this slide?):

Playing with Daddy's hats:

Playgroup coloring:

Sorting the Play-doh and evidence of a need for a haircut( which we got yesterday!!)

Amazing

(click on the program to read it)
I don't think this post will ever do justice to the night we held Cohen's concert. It could not have been any more than it was. Chris and I are overwhelmed, not only from the support we received but for the peace that God gave us through it all and for the way that our God was worshiped that night. Sometimes in walking through this journey, I feel God so close and other times God feels very far away. Friday night, I believe I could have almost touched Him.

I first want to give an overview for people who prayed for us from afar and weren't able to be there. Chris really poured his heart into this and prayerfully made each small decision about how the night should go. Everything down to the trivial candles in the lobby came together in an unbelievable way.




We didn't count but by estimation and other people's opinion we believe there were around 150 to 200 people there. We were so touched by all who showed up to love on us, Cohen, and to worship God. Seven songs were played - here was the set list:

Rest For the Weary - Cool Hand Luke
Came to my Rescue - Hilllsong United
Lord Let Your Glory Fall - Matt Redman
Til I See You - Hillsong United
Wonderful King - passion
Always - Chris McGowan
Night Must End - Sleeping At Last

Chris carefully picked each song to play for God and for Cohen. It was important for us for people to understand that this was not an early memorial service. This was a celebration of Cohen's life, a celebration of our wonderful God, and a celebration of the gift of music that Chris wants to share with his children.







We played a video after the first song to introduce people to Cohen. We wanted people to meet who they were praying for. We wanted people to know he is already a blessing and a miracle. I will try to post it to the blog as soon as I can.

We had asked one of our pastors to speak on prayer for 5 - 10 minutes during the service. He did a wonderful job and so willingly allowed God to just use him to speak His truth.
He spoke from Romans 8: 18-28. The scriptures seemed to leap off the page and settle in our hearts.


We had some corporate prayer. During one song, a friend of ours led the crowd in some specific prayer requests we gave him and at another time we had a a time of "free" prayer where we just invited people to pray individually, in groups, or with us. It was amazing. I felt so blessed to have people who love the Lord genuinely praying over us and Cohen. We would love continued prayer and here are our prayer requests:

1) Pray that God would heal Cohen.
2) Pray that if it is not God’s intention to heal Cohen, that He would protect him through the rest of
pregnancy and birth, and that we would have the opportunity to hold him alive.
3) Pray that God would give us strength and protect our hearts as we walk through this time,
and that we would respond to God honestly and with trust regardless of God’s plan for Cohen’s life.
4)Pray that we would trust God and cling to Him even if we and others don’t understand His
full purpose in this.
5) Pray that Cohen’s life , our faith, and the faith of those supporting us would glorify
God and allow those who may not know God to see Him.
6) Pray that God’s power, love, and sovereignty would be evident to all who are involved in this difficult
time.

We also had Cohen's box there. It's a box Chris and I got for him when we first found out about his disorder to keep all of the cards, emails, and words of encouragement in. We brought the box and people wrote prayers and letters for Cohen.




God was with us that night. He was in that room and I hope He was pleased. Believers united in prayer and in worship of Him in a way that I have not experienced in a while.




Cohen loved it. He didn't stop moving to the music and would often kick the hands of people praying for him and praising God.

I was so pleased for Chris as he really poured his heart into this. I was so pleased that God allowed that night to be exactly as we hoped for and more.

We are so thankful to everyone who helped us make it happen. It meant so much to Chris to have the guys he had playing with him there for God and Cohen.

Chris and I left that night feeling a peace that I almost wasn't expecting. A peace that we serve such a powerful God and just as the song, Let your Glory Fall, says, "You(God ) are Good and Your love endures." And we left from that night, not sad that it was over, or afraid of what is coming, but knowing our God is good and he loves us. And that will be enough.

First things First

Ok - I know you all want an update on the concert and I will work on that post next but I first feel I owe an update on how things went when we went to the funeral home a few weeks ago. I so very much appreciate everyone's prayers and I am so sorry that I have been delayed in posting about it. I actually wrote a long post last week about it and blogger wouldn't publish and I somehow managed to lose the post. Bummer.
Chris and I are continued to be amazed at how God protects us and goes before us. Needless to say we were dreading the funeral home appt. We didn't want to go but just felt we needed to. I was terrified that we would be pressured into making final decisions that we just aren't ready to make - terrified that somehow it was like we were giving up and failing our son. Our God is good. We went to the appointment and met with a lady named Jennifer. She was very nice and not at all pushy. We were there for probably about and hour and a half. We were not only not forced to make final arrangements, we weren't really even expected to. We received all the information we need to plan and prepare as much as we decide to but she will meet is in the hospital if or when the time arises and we can share our decisions then. This felt so much better somehow- just that Cohen doesn't have a funeral arrangement completely written up and filed. She took simple information that seemed normal and natural and provided us with what we needed. In the end I was almost even glad that we went - she was able to bring up some things that we probably wouldn't have thought of and if the time arises wouldn't have been able to pull together last minute. Chris and I talked later that day about how it seemed so strange to do that one morning and to leave unbroken. Some would call it adrenaline. We call it God.
That afternoon I received a letter in the mail from a girl I know from college. We don't see or speak often but somehow God used her for me that day. Chris and I were struggling so much with the balance of preparation and faithfulness. We felt a bit faithless going to the funeral home and we felt a bit like our faith was not where it needed to be because we would always qualify our belief that God could heal Cohen with the statement that we know he may not and therefore continue with preparations in case he does not. In the letter, she wrote of the story of Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-nego. It is always amazing to me how the scriptures can speak to you a million times over. Here is this story that we learned at a young age in children's Bibles but I needed someone to point it out to me for me to hear God in it for this time in my life. Nebuchadnezzar throws the three into the furnace and their response is this,
" If to be so, our God Whom we serve is able to deliver us from the furnace of blazing fire, and He will deliver us out of you hand, O king. But even if he does not, let it be known to you, O king, that we are not going to serve your gods or worship the golden image you have set up." Daniel 3:17-18

God does deliver them. Their faith that God can is enough. They know he may not and their hearts choose to worship God anyway. That is were we are. We could walk into that funeral home and walk out unbroken because our faith rests in a God that is real. It rests in a God that is sovereign and and a God that can heal. It rests in a God that is good and that loves us. We walked out unbroken because we do have hope. It doesn't mean all our days are easy - it doesn't mean I never fear but it means we have hope - hope that God's way will always prevail.

The hospital tour was also good for us. Some things had changed since Cort was born in a good way and it allowed us to have a better picture of how things might go that day.

I again want to thank everyone for their prayers and support. We feel it.

update soon

I promise I'll update soon! Blogger gave me trouble all weekend and yesterday. It seems to be working today so  I am going to try to get updates up today or tomorrow but thought I'd let you guys know it was coming.